I always hate to hear when people are being negative about an LDR relationship when the people involved are clearly happy :( I’m sorry they aren’t being more supportive.
As for advice, I’d say first separate those negative things that have been said into two categories - things that were probably said out of concern, and things that were probably said out of jealousy/other negative emotions.
Deal with the negativity that comes from concerns first. Friends should of course be concerned for your well being, but they should try to express concerns while also being supportive of your own feelings. Whichever friends you have that you think this might apply to, talk through it with them. Address their concerns, but also explain that their negativity is hurtful to you. A real friend will listen, do their best to accept your choices, and refrain from hurtful comments.
Now for the negativity that stems from jealousy, spite, or whatever else - if you have friends that are always like this about your relationship, you might need to think about if they are true friends at all. Friendships always have their ups and downs and of course negative things get said at times, but this also shouldn’t be a constant dynamic in your friendship. Toxic friendships are not worth keeping. If you aren’t sure if a friendship is actually toxic or if you’re just having a “rough patch” with a particular friend, then talk to them directly about this issue. Call them out on their behavior (calmly, and rationally) and tell them specifically the kinds of comments they make that upset you. If they listen, apologize, express concern, and/or try to compromise, then you can probably work through it and save your friendship. However if they get defensive, angry, combative, or verbally abusive - they are not a friend and you need to get out now.
I hope this helps in some way, good luck dear.
- Erika
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